When you believe

It's just a random title.

I have been struggling with {Article 81, Article 82, State Aids} etc etc. Well, it seems a lot but it isn't. Because I am far too slow on it! Too slow. Like an aged horse dragging a full cart of coal. Someone give me enthusiasm please?

I have a passion with what I am studying. I advocate equal opportunities with a passion and hate law makers also with a passion. It has supported my study for 5 years. Not like some, I don't argue for appreciating the art, don't dig into the sources for enjoying the complexity, don't go detours for accumulating fine techniques. I am always arguing, digging and exploring for a destiny too naive, that people deserve better options than they are having now. I am not going to discuss it in this post. Read my Chinese blog in case of interest.

It was rather vague about this passion, you are thinking. It's too broad. Well when I was in China I don't think there are too many ends to this passion. - I can think about an utopia, a utopidank or an usatopia but we cannot make it into reality. I may but I'm yet to become influencial. Actually I have thought about that long, long ago when I didn't know much about pain. After I have given up that thought of utopia, it became appearent that we lack the most basic dignity and safety in our country. (Inspired by Man-Tao Leung: we lack common sense) - so the one end to my destiny is that people are living on people's will but the artificial leviathan's, economy's or rulling systems' (including the 'families' in the oriental world).

Of course I read and knew all those dillema in legal theories, political games and philosophic hypothesis. I read and knew about the world (not the people). I went to places in and out of my country and knew situations otherwise. And I am improving myself not to be limited. Nevertheless, when people I meet everyday are living vulnerably and aimlessly, I have no interest argue with you how much market share an EC company owns should it be judged dominant and being stopped from merging another so as to achieve harmony.

I don't know whether to call this a belief or not, but searching for a civil way to resolve the lack of 'common sense' has been echoing in my mind in whatever I do. Meanwhile I find it vague. If it is not vague I could have written a book during the 4 years;) But I'm still too far away from a systematic thinker. Let alone a practitioner.

So I always seek to enthusiasm - passion, until I came up with Henry Miller today:

Back of every creation, supporting it like an arch, is faith. Enthusiasm is nothing, it comes and goes. But if one believes, then miracles occur.

Then, shall I seek my faith then? I always say I have one, but damn, whatever I describe it, there is someone doubting it. And that someone is myself.

I need a talk with someone. But there's no one to talk to at the moment - during exams, Article 81 and 82s.